SW​:​S Retreat November VA 2018

by SongwritingWith:Soldiers

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    Our retreats pair professional songwriters with veterans, military families and couples, and active-duty service members to write songs about their military experiences and returning home.
    The following veterans and spouses participated in the November 2018 BCR VA retreat: Paul & Tina Bergeron, Jason & Marylee Locey, Ken & Amber Roads, John & Alice Seibert, Shawn & Kate Thomas
    These songs are their stories from this retreat.
    These are songs recorded on site at retreats. They capture a song just hours after being written, like the song taking its first breath.
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1.
Jason & Marylee Locey / John & Alice Seibert / Paul & Tina Bergeron / Ken & Amber Roads / Shawn & Kate Thomas / Darden Smith I want to see you I want you to see me Who I am Who you are Where we stand Come so far I want to see you And I want you to see me too I get so nervous and don’t know what to expect Spent most of my life thinking I know what comes next It takes a certain kind of stupid to marry someone like me But here we are and we are where we are meant to be I want to see you I want you to see me Who I am Who you are Where we stand Come so far I want to see you And I want you to see me too I thought it was gonna to be easy it’s been anything but Separation, accidents, injuries, we never know what Waiting on phone calls, scared of the knock on the door I’m looking forward to when we don’t have to live this way anymore I want to see you I want you to see me Who I am Who you are Where we stand Come so far I want to see you And I want you to see me too So we can have the time We promised so long ago Some way some day To have and to hold I want to see you I want you to see me Who I am Who you are Where we stand We come so far I want to see you I want you to see me Who I am Who you are Where we stand We come so far I want to see you And I want you to see me too I want you to see me And I want you to see me too © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Darden Smith Music (ASCAP)
2.
Shawn & Kate Thomas / Mary Gauthier He proposed at the gun range, it was my birthday surprise We got married fast, tied the knot on the 4th of July By September he was gone for nine months, oceans away I stayed busy as I could but I cried almost every day She knew from day one saving lives is what I’m here to do I’m Army, EOD, and I love my work thru and thru I’d have left it if she asked but I knew she never would She understands our sacrifice serves a greater good One day we’ll travel with the seasons In the summer we’ll go north and catch some fish In the winter we’ll ride south on the Victory to the desert just to kiss Anything is easier than living like this When Wade got killed we lost more than our best friend Then we lost Nick and we went thru it all again We saw their names go on the wall, watched the flags changing hands Now there’s a hole in our family it goes on and on and it never ends One day we’ll travel with the seasons In the summer go north and catch some fish In the winter ride south on the Victory to the desert just to kiss Anything is easier than living like this One day it will be easier than living like this © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Mary Gauthier Songs (ASCAP)
3.
Paul & Tina Bergeron /Jay Clementi When I shut down I’m not trying to hurt you I’m trying to shield you from The dark side of my pain Cuz it still runs wild After all these years Anger, hurt and bitterness Is still burning through my veins So baby sit down and take my hand There’s some things about your man That I don’t understand myself, That’s why I’m asking for your help I wanna be better for you, be the man I promised to The one you thought you knew Baby you’re my only light And need you now, to help me carry the fight I’ve tried on my own But it left me feeling hopeless But you put warmth in my heart And it’s all coming in focus Our love is strong enough To fight these demons out of me Your eyes are the mirror To my soul baby let’s set it free Baby sit down and take my hand There’s some things about your man That I don’t understand myself, That’s why I’m asking for your help I wanna be better for you be the man I promised to The one you thought you knew Baby you’re my only light And need you now, to help me carry, carry the fight Carry the fight, Carry the fight, Carry the fight Carry the fight, Carry the fight So baby sit down and take my hand There’s some things about your man That I don’t understand myself, That’s why I’m asking for your help I wanna be better for you, be the man I promised to Baby the one you thought you knew Baby you’re my only light And need you now, to help carry Baby won’t you help carry, carry the fight Carry the fight Carry the fight Carry the fight Carry the fight Carry the fight © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Sony ATV Cross Keys (ASCAP)
4.
Ken & Amber Roads / Darden Smith I’ve been alone all of my life Hard as a stone making sure I survive Learning how to break that stone in two Learning how to open up to you But letting myself love And be loved in return The wheels on the heart Can be the hardest wheels to turn But if I’d only known then all I know now All my mistakes if I could take them back somehow Don’t want to go down that road again I want a love that’s more than just pretend But letting myself love And be loved in return The wheels on the heart Can be the hardest wheels to turn I get scared I feel ashamed It’s just the way that I was trained I built a wall that I could hide behind I can’t take it any more I’m walking through a different door And I’m strong enough to reach the other side Of letting myself love And be loved in return The wheels on the heart Can be the hardest wheels to turn Of letting myself love And be loved in return The wheels on the heart Can be the hardest wheels to turn Hardest wheels to turn © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Darden Smith Music (ASCAP)
5.
I WAS HOME 03:45
Jason & Marylee Locey / Jay Clementi 15 years old jet black hair, I looked at you and did a double take Boom box on my shoulder jamming out to a little Dire Straits, You had a Marilyn smile, Madonna hair, you were everything I wanted standing there You said whoever that is, tell em chicks ain’t free Money ain’t for nothing, hey you wanna come drink with me That natty light did the job we were free falling down at gobblers knob We coulda stayed forever, forever in our little world I knew you were an Angel sent for me girl You saved me with that first kiss, every word made me wanna give You my heart and soul For the first time it felt like I was home Like I was home Life goes on and takes us down some broken roads- We lost touch for so many years but we never really let go Of that fire, that flame I wanting you have my last name So when you reached out to me, from out of the blue I felt alive again, reading those words from you All my hopes and dreams, were in the glow of that laptop screen, screen We coulda stayed forever, forever in our little world I knew you were an Angel sent for me girl You saved me with that first kiss, every word made me wanna give You my heart and soul For the first time it felt like I was home We both made it through our own November rain And landed in each others arms somehow once again 19 years since our last touch I’ve got you back I’m never giving you up We can stay forever, forever in our little world You are the Angel sent for me girl You saved me with every kiss, every word makes me wanna give You my heart and soul You’re the only place I feel Like home, feel like home © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Sony ATV Cross Keys (ASCAP)
6.
THE HEALER 04:07
John Seibert /Darden Smith You lifted me when I could not lift myself I was broken in a thousand different ways In the bright light in a white room You were always next to me And you gave me the strength to carry on God sent an angel To heal my body and my soul You’re the healer And you made me whole You showed me how to fight through every fear You gave me hope that I could be myself You showed me how to laugh again And as long as you were next to me I had the strength, the strength to carry on God sent an angel To heal my body and my soul You’re the healer And you made me whole I know that you struggled Some scars you cannot hide It made me want to fight a little harder Just keep getting better And together we found the strength to carry on God sent an angel To heal my body and my soul You’re the healer Yeah God sent an angel To heal my body and my soul You’re the healer And you made me whole You made me whole Oh you made me whole © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Darden Smith Music (ASCAP)
7.
Amber Roads / Mary Gauthier Air Force EOD, a woman on the front line Catcalls, whistles and stares, on guard all the time I made it thru combat I was stronger than I knew But I let my guard down when I met you Was I in love with a lie? Was I in love with a dream? Was I in love with love? Is anyone who they seem? When you’re around I want to feel the truth I speak But I lose my way and I just feel weak I come from addiction I come from abuse Come from a long line of liars but I trusted you You felt like home it was the worst thing I could feel Cause where I come from it’s hard to know what’s real Was I in love with a lie? Was I in love with a dream? Was I in love with love? Is anyone who they seem? When you’re around I want to feel the truth I speak But I lose my way and I just feel weak Here in the in between I grow stronger every day I have friends all around me to help me find my way Winter is here, but spring is around the bend For every beginning, there has to be an end Was I in love with a lie? Was I in love with a dream? Was I in love with love? Is anyone who they seem? When you’re around I want to feel the truth I speak But I lose my way and I just feel weak I know I’ll find my way, but for now I just feel weak © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Mary Gauthier Songs (ASCAP)
8.
John & Alice Seibert / Darden Smith We met on a Monday night , drunk in a bar Swagger meets hot chick, Alabama boy meets girl 90 days together in the first five years We kept it all together laughing through the tears Bomb-boy and Ginger taking on the world I’m invincible She’s tough as shit Together we’re unstoppable Never gonna quit A force of nature And together we can weather the storm Miracle to miracle, combat to motorcycle wreck Then came a boy named Jack and the house became a home The struggle makes us stronger a bit more rope Attitude of gratitude, hearts full of hope We might be out in the woods but we’re not in the woods alone She’s invincible I’m tough as shit Together we’re unstoppable Never gonna quit A force of nature And together we can weather the storm Faith, stubbornness and Motrin got us where are We don’t know where we’re going but we think it’s out beyond the stars It’s the journey, it’s the dream, it’s the walk, it’s the ride Bomb-boy and Ginger and Doodlebug side by side Yeah we’re invincible Tough as shit Together we’re unstoppable Never gonna quit A force of nature Together we can weather the storm A force of nature Together we can weather the storm © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Darden Smith Music (ASCAP)
9.

credits

released December 12, 2018

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