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SW​:​S November 2020, Boulder Crest, VA

by SongwritingWith:Soldiers

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Jamshid Faryar
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Colin Connors
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    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

    Our retreats pair professional songwriters with veterans, military families and couples, and active-duty service members to write songs about their military experiences and transition home. These field recordings were recorded on-site at a SongwritingWith:Soldiers retreat and capture a song being performed just hours after it's been written, like a song capturing its first breath.

    Participant Co-Writers: 
    Logan Mills / Jack Canaday / Matthew Meuser / Steven Jarrett / Gus Rayer / Rick Hoback

    Singer-Songwriters:
    Maia Sharp / Will Kimbrough / Jay Clementi

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1.
Brand New Countdown Song 03:14
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BRAND NEW COUNTDOWN SONG Logan Mills / Jack Canaday / Matthew Meuser Steven Jarrett / Gus Rayer / Rick Hoback Maia Sharp / Will Kimbrough / Jay Clementi The smell of burning powder makes me smile And you know something’s ready to go boom That riverbed of bombs went for a mile Move out boys got a big blast coming soon That sixth sense got me home That fifth of Jack got me stoned Before I knew I was in the zone Four feet of fuse, three minutes long I wanna walk in my hometown sun Lay down my burdens and my gun But 2’s still 1 and 1’s still none This is my brand new countdown song What I learned down range kept me alive I’m trying to be present with my family That training might have made me a different guy You know sometimes it just gets the best of me That sixth sense got me home That fifth of Jack got me stoned Before I knew I was in the zone Four feet of fuse, three minutes long I wanna walk in the hometown sun Lay down my burdens and my gun But 2’s still 1 and 1’s still none This is my brand new countdown song Those days of fire in the hole are gone This is my brand new countdown song Four, three, two, one (Chorus)
2.
A Little Less Lost 03:47
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A LITTLE LESS LOST Matthew Meuser / Maia Sharp When I was seventeen, the story wasn’t written But like a child I thought I knew the end Then I was back at chapter one wide open ready to begin again Wonderin’ how the hell do I just keep on writing When all that I could see were my lost friends The combat-to-home transition from the war abroad to the war within I’m remembering the stepping stones that got me back Starting at rock bottom through my path out of the black To be a husband, a father My wife, my daughters My reasons to reappear That’s how I got here And they know that I’m still walking but I’m not walking alone anymore Oh yeah and I still might be broken, but I’m not broken to the core Sometimes I hear my demons out there knocking on the door But I wouldn’t be where I am if I hadn’t been to hell before I’m remembering the stepping stones that got me back Starting at rock bottom through my path out of the black To be a husband, and a father My wife, my daughters My reasons to reappear That’s how I got here With every bridge I crossed I got a little less lost And the first time I shot up a flare, my brothers were there I remember all the stepping stones that got me back Starting at rock bottom through my path out of the black To be a husband, a father For my wife, for my daughters She wouldn’t let me disappear She’s how I got here She’s how I got here How I got here
3.
I Know Who You Are 02:44
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I KNOW WHO YOU ARE Logan Mills / Jack Canaday / Matthew Meuser Steven Jarrett / Gus Rayer / Rick Hoback Jay Clementi / Maia Sharp / Will Kimbrough Talking all the crazy shit We can laugh about it now We all remember walking through the base EOD proud I don’t know you, but I know who you are I don’t know you, but I know who you are We all know death We all have scars I don’t know you brother, but I know who you are I’m honored to be surrounded By a brand new band of brothers We’ve all lost some friends And we understand each other I don’t know you, but I know who you are I don’t know you, but I know who you are We all know death We all have scars I don’t know you brother, but I know who you are Two is one One is none You know where I’m coming from I don’t know you, but I know who you are I don’t know you, but I know who you are We all know death We all have scars I don’t know you brother, but I know who you are
4.
Live In Your Truth 03:39
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LIVE IN YOUR TRUTH Rick Hoback / Jay Clementi Chasing a faint reflection Of how I used to be Didn’t think it’d be this damn hard To get back to me I hold on to resentment And doubt so tight I know it’s wrong But I let it keep me up at night I wish I knew what it’s like to live in your truth I wanna sit on your deck watch the sunset You gotta helluva a view I wish I knew what it’s like to live in your truth Let the shadows of the past go I wanna know what it’s like to live in your truth I see the joy you have In your eyes and smile That’s what I want to have Lord, it’s been a while It’s just another step behind day I have now and again I never know how it starts But I know how it ends I wish I knew what it’s like to live in your truth I wanna sit on your deck watch the sunset You gotta have a helluva a view I wish I knew what it’s like to live in your truth Let the shadows of the past go I wanna know what it’s like to live in your truth Chasing a faint reflection Of how I wanna be Learning day by day to find That kinda peace in me I wish I knew what it’s like to live in your truth I wanna sit on your deck watch the sunset You gotta have a beautiful a view I wish I knew what it’s like to live in your truth Let the shadows of the past go I wanna know what it’s like to live in your truth
5.
Living Proof 03:20
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LIVING PROOF Gus Rayer / Will Kimbrough I am maybe half the man I was before the war Sometimes I can’t find the simple words I’m looking for Somehow friends and family always seem to have my back To help me on my way and make up for what I lack I may seem too humble, maybe that’s just me I first learned to see my worth in school for EOD I still did the foolish things that most young people do I found a partner for my life the day that I found you I may have been a pompous ass when we first met But I just wasn’t ready for a woman like you yet I am living proof there is some higher power After all the foolish things I’ve done I can see now that everything’s connected And in this higher power we are one My family’s everything to me The meaning of my life I want to grow old enough to take care of my wife The way she takes good care of me Each and every day I want to be there for her in my own special way I’m a husband, I’m a father, I’m a soldier, and a friend I’m a grandfather now and it’s all because of them There is living proof for a higher power All these things we get to share in life Every little thing is even more connected I see it in my children and my wife I sing it and it sets my spirit free The only thing they need from me is me Sing it like a preacher sings a hymn All I really need from them is them There is living proof for that higher power Everywhere you look it’s all around From the young and old Every day and hour Living in the precious love we’ve found Living proof that love is all around
6.
That's My War 03:20
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THAT'S MY WAR Jack Canaday / Jay Clementi Did you know that you can smell fear I’ve smelled it on my own skin Like acid and burnt tin foil Stow it with pride and adrenaline I’ve been to the depths of war I’ve seen the best of men Seen the fire and the look in their eyes That only blood can quench That’s my war, that’s my war My cross to bear from all the tours I used to wonder if there’s any of me left Or is it just fear and loss and regret I count to four, kick in the door I’m not the man I was before, that’s my war I’ve touched the walls of Babylon Felt the lives before me It’s hard believe there’s so much pain Surrounded by such beauty, it just gets to me That’s my war, that’s my war My cross to bear from all the tours I used to wonder if there’s any of me left Or is it just fear and loss and regret I count to four, kick in the door I’m not the man I was before, that’s my war I’m not the father or the husband that I can be yet Standing there at our front door I take in a long deep breath Tell myself it’s gonna be alright But afraid of what’s inside That’s my war, that’s my war My cross to bear from all the tours I used to wonder if there’s any of me left Or is it just fear and loss and regret I count to four walkin the door, Cause I can’t kick it in anymore That’s my war
7.
The Garden 03:54
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THE GARDEN Steven Jarrett / Will Kimbrough There is a garden here for us all No one can see til they get past the wall The journey is long but it’s never too late The wall serves its purpose We need to open the gate Some walls are built to keep people in Others are built to keep people out Tell me my friend just what kind of wall Are you talking about Walls made of stone, sombre and high God only knows all the beauty inside No matter which path you take They all lead to the gate There is a garden here for us all No one can see til they get past the wall The journey is long but it’s never too late The wall serves its purpose We need to open the gate Everyone’s different, but we’re all the same Everyone deals with their own kind of pain There is a garden here for us all No one can see til they get past the wall The journey is long but it’s never too late The wall serves its purpose We need to open the gate
8.
This Is Where That Ends 03:58
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THIS IS WHERE THAT ENDS Logan Mills / Maia Sharp All the people around here somehow fitting in Celebrities and hippies seem so natural in their skin I never found an anchor, somewhere that felt like home I give other people breath then I catch mine alone So I put my head down and got so good at short connections That I could only glance even at my own reflection But now the man in the mirror is looking more like who I know Now that you’ve shown me another way to go I used to be a chameleon, I could I fit in anywhere Anywhere and nowhere is one and the same I didn’t know where I was going until you took me there I feel more like myself every time you say my name All my life I’ve been changing my skin Baby this is where that ends Baby this is where that ends When you found me I was broken, a shadow of myself Barely treading water, too proud to ask for help Still carrying old demons, dragging them around With you in my life I can finally lay them down I used to be a chameleon, I could I fit in anywhere Anywhere and nowhere is one and the same I didn’t know where I was going until you took me there I feel more like myself every time you say my name All my life I’ve been changing my skin Baby this is where that ends Baby this is where that ends I’ve been in the desert dying of thirst And your love is like water saving me I used to be a chameleon, I could I fit in anywhere Anywhere and nowhere is one and the same I didn’t know where I was going until you took me there I feel more like myself every time you say my name All my life I’ve been changing my skin Baby this is where that ends Baby this is where that ends This is where that ends

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released November 25, 2020

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SongwritingWith:Soldiers Nashville, Tennessee

SongwritingWith:Soldiers is a non-profit 501c (3) organization.

Our Mission: We transform lives by using collaborative songwriting to expand creativity, connections, and strengths.

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