SW​:​S Retreat - November 2015

by SongwritingWith:Soldiers

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    Our retreats pair professional songwriters with veterans, military families, and active-duty service members to write songs about their military experiences and returning home.
    James Bacinski and Ashleigh Smith, Tom and Christina Coyle, Juan Carlos Kaplan and Ximena Rozo, Andy and Robin Kaufmann, Ray and Alice Palumbo, Luis Rivera, Benny and April Rodriguez, and Kevin and Rebecca Sakaki participated in the November 2015 retreat.
    These songs are their stories and are recorded on site at retreats. They capture a song just hours after being written, like the song taking its first breath.
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1.
WHITE KNUCKLE LOVE James Bacinski and Ashleigh Smith / Mary Gauthier I married a man and he went off to war When he came back it really got hard The man who came home looked strong and true His face was like yours but he wasn’t you Since you came back since you came home I thought it’d be different but I’m still alone Don’t know what to do don’t know what to say White knuckle love, a high price to pay I miss your love I miss your care You’re right next to me but you’re not there When I look in your eyes you look away You need to leave when I need you to stay Since you came back since you came home I thought it’d be different but I’m still alone I don’t know what to do I don’t know what to say White knuckle love, a high price to pay Anger is easy anger is deep But baby I hurt way down underneath For better or worse we took a vow I need you to hold me, I need you now Since you came back since you came home I thought it’d be different but I’m still alone I don’t know what to do I don’t know what to say White knuckle love, a high price to pay © 2015 Mary Gauthier Songs / SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP)
2.
OUT OF THE WOODS Tom and Christina Coyle / James House Ghosts in your closets Gotta run from your thoughts Haunted by your memories Time to take another walk Gotta go gotta get away But there’s nowhere to run Can’t see the future when you’re under the gun Baby you got me out of the woods Seems like forever since I felt this good Try to explain myself but I was misunderstood Took me by the hand and led me Out of the woods I can’t watch the news Don’t wanna know Seen enough hurt for ten lifetimes Kind that crush your soul Over my head In too deep Keeps me up all night I never sleep Baby you brought me out of the woods Seems like forever since I felt this good Try to explain myself but I was misunderstood Took me by hand and led me Out of the woods Time to change Time to come back Time to realize where I’ve been at Can’t fix something if you don’t know what’s wrong When you need it right now…it can take so long Baby you brought me out of the woods Seems like forever since I felt this good Try to explain myself but I was misunderstood Took me by hand and led me Out of the woods
3.
Above Ground 03:25
ABOVE GROUND James House / Darden Smith / & Group Without you I’d be two-fisted drinker going to hell Without you There’d be no story to tell I look at you and I see strong Without you I’d be gone Walking down a different trail Singing a different song Cause of your love I’m above ground Cause of your love I’m above ground Cause of you I’m a better version of me Cause of you I’m little bit closer to free Finally found a place where I belong It’s right here in your arms After everything I put you through Now I wanna make it all up to you Cause of your love I’m above ground Cause of your love I’m above ground Other than my brothers Only you can see The pain that I carry inside of me So thank you for still loving me And keeping me above ground Cause of your love I’m above ground Cause of your love I’m above ground Together now we’re free to run Together now we are one
4.
THE COMMON THREAD (WAS LOVE) Juan Carlos Kaplan and Ximena Rozo / Beth Nielsen Chapman There’s this moment as we danced When we both took a chance And embraced this romance It changed our lives There’s this moment that broke our heart When the whole world fell apart And the bright blue sky went dark It changed our lives How does love survive How does hope stay alive As we pass through…every door And we dance to the songs Taking turns holding on El hilo conductor Fue el amor There’s a pause before the knock Where the silence meets the shock And the hands freeze on the clock Changes lives How does love survive How does hope stay alive As we pass through…every door And we dance to the songs Taking turns holding on El hilo conductor Fue el amor Life changing love changing life changing love Love changing life changing love And we dance to the songs Taking turns holding on El hilo conductor Fue el amor And the common thread is love
5.
All About Me 02:20
ALL ABOUT ME James House / Darden Smith / & Group Here we are sitting writing these songs Bout nothing is right and everything's wrong About how we gonna fight overseas Trying to keep everybody else free When all I want to do is talk about me What do you think about me I got wants I got needs Nothing but aces up my sleeve I know it's hard for you to relate But we both know I'm pretty damned great It’s all about me It’s all about me What do you think about me I taught Chuck Norris how to fight Shakira thinks I dance alright Hung like Einstein smart as a horse I put the special in special force It’s all about me It’s all about me What do you think about me When god made me, he broke the mold Just thinking about it never gets old That look in your eye says it's time to go I invented that line, don't you know I got people to do and places to see Did I mention that it's all about me It’s all about me It’s all about me What do you think about me
6.
TEN ACRES AND A TRACTOR Ray Palumbo / Alice Palumbo / James House I’m a city slicker by day Fighting that traffic jam I see where I wanna be in my rear view mirror And I wanna be heading back Take off this suit put on my cowboy boots Hear my sweet girl’s laughter Get back to a life of me and you Ten acres and a tractor It’s been a long hard day Baby I’m heading home Man’s gotta do what he’s gotta do Sure don’t want to do it alone At the end of the day on my way Back to what really matters Don’t need much just a little love Ten acres and a tractor Start this journey on one road End up on the next Go as far as you can go Take a right then take a left Thought I wanted this, but I really wanted that For all that happens in between You end up where you’re at It’s been a long hard day Baby I’m headed home Man’s gotta do what he’s gotta do But he sure don’t wanna do it alone At the end of the day on my way Back to what really matters Don’t need much just a little love Ten acres and a tractor
7.
KEEPING ME HERE Benny and April Rodriguez / Darden Smith / James House Mentally, physically, emotionally I'm as broke as you can get I’ve been close but I ain’t hit bottom yet Lately it feels like I’m just treading water Everyday seems the same Round and round and around circling that drain It’s your love That’s keeping me here And it breaks my heart to think I might cause you tears If I push you away It’s just to keep you safe While I’m trying to get my head clear It’s your love that’s keeping me here I know inside I used to be different After all that I’ve been through If you’d seen what I’ve seen you’d be different too I've been living my second life The first one ended, can’t tell you why I'm just lucky I’ve got something worth living for It’s your love That’s keeping me here And it breaks my heart to think I might cause you tears If I push you away It’s just to keep you safe While I’m trying to get my head clear It’s your love that’s keeping me here It’s not tomorrow It’s not yesterday It’s not about trying to make right All of my mistakes I just want peace And a little truth If it’s the last thing That I do It’s your love That’s keeping me here And it breaks my heart to think I might cause you tears If I push you away It’s just to keep you safe While I’m trying to get my head clear It’s your love that’s keeping me here
8.
THE WAR AFTER THE WAR Christina Coyle / Robin Kaufmann / April Rodriguez / Ximena Rozo / Rebecca Sakaki / Ashleigh Smith / Beth Nielsen Chapman / Mary Gauthier Who’s gonna care for the ones who care for the ones who went to war Landmines in the living room eggshells on the floor I lost myself in the shadow of your honor and your pain You stare out the window as our dreams go down the drain Invisible the war after the war I get no basic training I get no purple heart I’m supposed to carry on I can’t fall apart People look at you and thank you for the sacrifice you made They look at me and smile and say I’m lucky you’re ok Invisible the war after the war I’m a soldier too just like you Serving something bigger than myself I serve unseen caught in between my pain and the pain of someone else I’m stronger than you think I am I’m right here by your side I am not your enemy I don’t want to fight There’s no going back in time I know you’re not the same But you are not the only one for whom the world has changed Invisible the war after the war
9.
Cry For Help 03:19
CRY FOR HELP Luis Riviera / Kevin Sakaki / Darden Smith I been all the way down to the bottom To the place where the light can't shine When I was all the way down someone Listened to this story of mine I was dying on the inside I cried for help Someone was listening for my cry for help When I start to judge the broken people I can't recognize myself The devil that we carry inside our soul Keeps us from seeing everybody else When you're dying on the inside Cry for help I'll be listening for your cry for help If you're dying on the inside Cry for help I'll be listening for your cry for help Anger comes from sadness Freedom comes from loss We don't have to hold on Anymore Everybody needs mercy Love is what we all desire Fear is the only thing that keeps us Keeps us from the fire If you're dying on the inside Cry for help I'll be listening for your cry for help
10.
GOD NEVER GIVES US MORE THAN WE CAN HANDLE Andy and Robin Kaufmann / Darden Smith Two kids on the Army train We'd settle down then we're gone again Just get home, you're going back Loaded up with different packs One goes away, one stays home Trying to connect on the telephone We never knew that we were that strong But it's only when life goes wrong You see how much you can take And still stay standing God never gives us more than we can handle Twelve houses in twenty-one years Three kids and a million tears Not knowing the words to say Missed birthdays and holidays Being afraid to watch the news Trying not to get numb to what we live through We never knew that we were that strong But it's only when life goes wrong You see how much you can take And still stay standing God never gives us more than we can handle God never gives us more than we can handle One foot in front of the other Everyday we get a little bit closer We don't know what tomorrow brings After all we've been through Baby we can handle anything We never knew that we were that strong Cause it's only when life goes wrong See how much we can take And we're still standing God never gives us more than we can handle God never gives us more than we can handle
11.
Surrender 03:21
SURRENDER Kevin and Rebecca Sakaki / Mary Gauthier Alone and stranded on the dark side There were no stars at night My hatred and my anger Blocked every ray of light I couldn’t find my compass I was lost in the abyss There were no rights or wrongs down there Only emptiness and No surrender, no surrender I don’t know how you found me there I don’t know what you saw I thought I was invisible Another prisoner of the war It was death before dishonor It was fight and die in place It was head high in the battle No expression on my face and No surrender, no surrender Your love is stronger than the hate and the horror inside me I look at you and know the kind of man I long to be You came to me a sunrise Through the black through the cold You took my hand and walked with me Through hell and brought me home and I surrender, I surrender
12.
Intriguing 02:45
INTRIGUING Darden Smith & Group It’s intriguing It’s a mystery I’m intrigued by you And you’re intrigued by me It’s the great unknown It’s the danger zone It’s like, how does Keith do it Being such a Rolling Stone It’s unexplainable Uncontainable It’s that irresistible Love All I know Is it’s where I want to go Times like right now When I’m feeling low It’s unpredictable Unapproachable It’s that unquenchable Love We don’t know Where it’s gonna go So let’s take it slow And see if it’s time for a change

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released January 27, 2016

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SongwritingWith:Soldiers Nashville, Tennessee

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