SW​:​S Retreat - January 23, 2014

by SongwritingWith:Soldiers

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

    All purchases are tax-deductible donations to SongwritingWith:Soldiers. Our mission is to hold retreats that pair professional songwriters with military veterans to write songs about their experiences of combat and returning home.
    Participating military service members include Frank Acevedo, Curtis Campbell, Mario Candela, Jesse Hopkin II, Erminio (Manny) Orona, Jimmy Perez, Jerryl Rita, John Sweredoski, and Raul Villanueva Jr. These songs are their stories.

      name your price

     

1.
03:34
2.
3.
03:03
4.
5.
6.
02:40
7.
8.
9.
02:42
10.
02:25

about

Songwriters include Radney Foster, Brad Parker, and Darden Smith.

credits

released May 16, 2014

Thank you for your support of SongwritingWith:Soldiers.

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

SongwritingWith:Soldiers Austin, Texas

Founded by Austin, Texas singer-songwriter Darden Smith, SongwritingWith:Soldiers is a non-profit 501c (3) organization. Our mission is to assist in the emotional healing process of both active duty U.S. soldiers and veterans through collaborative songwriting. ... more

contact / help

Contact SongwritingWith:Soldiers

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Track Name: Numb
NUMB
Jesse Hopkin / John Sweredoski / Darden Smith

Numb, I’m so numb
From what I’ve done
And what I’ve seen
Cold, the nights are so cold The days are dark
As dark can be
I’ve seen too much
I gave too much
Can’t you see I’m on my knees

My heart still beats
My eyes still see
But when my mouth starts to speak
The words don’t come
Cause I’m numb

Something took hold
Of my soul
And left it lying cold on the battlefield
But high
I’ve never felt so high
And I’ve been chasing that high ever since my first kill

And I lost so much
I miss so much
The big part of me that I left overseas

Am I chasing my demons
Are my demons chasing me
How far am I willing to run
How long am I willing to be numb
Track Name: Please Don't Let Me...
PLEASE DON'T LET ME...
Curt Campbell / Mario Candela / Manny Orona / Radney Foster

In the dark of the night, in the fog of war
It doesn’t really matter what we’re doing this for
Your buddy on your left and the one on your right
They’re just like you, when you get on line
The same prayer’s in every one of us
Dear God, please don’t let me fuck this up

We all got our reasons why we’re here
We can’t quit our jobs till it’s all clear
We all want to get home to the ones we love
Dear God, please don’t let me fuck this up
(Don’t let me fuck this up)

I wish I could swim, to the bottom of the sea
To get my friend, lying there asleep
Cause he’s down there, and I’m still here
Chasing down what-ifs
Through all these tears
We both had the same prayer inside of us
Dear God, please don’t let me fuck this up

We lost Paul and we lost Smitty
We lost Rich and too damn many

We all got our reasons why we’re here
We can’t quit our jobs till it’s all clear
All we wanted was to come home to the ones we love
Prayin’ Dear God, please don’t let me fuck this up
(Don’t let me fuck this up)
Track Name: Call Of Duty
CALL OF DUTY
Frank Acevedo / Jimmy Perez / Darden Smith / Brad Parker

Come a day when the cold wind blew
No one told me but I knew
Mama smiled as I walked out the door
She said, “Thank you for your service –
That’s what we’re here for”

Call of duty
It’s strong and it’s true
I got no expectations It’s just what I do
The call of duty

Comin’ home from the sands of Iraq
My little angel was callin’ me back
Saluted the colonel, said I’m goin’ AWOL for awhile
My wife needs me, we just lost a child

Call of duty
It’s strong and it’s true
I got no expectations
It’s just what I do
The call of duty

Family and country, country and family
It’s all the same to me – it’s the...

Call of duty
It’s strong and it’s true
I got no expectations
It’s just what I do
The call of duty
Track Name: No Me Preguntes
NO ME PREGUNTES
Mario Candela / Erminio (Manny) Orona / Jimmy Perez / Radney Foster

No me preguntes nada
Nada de la guerra
No me preguntes que paso
No quiero decirte mentiras

You can never know the truth
About how it really was
All those memories never leave me
They are part of who I’ve become

No me preguntes nada
Nada de la guerra
No me preguntes que paso
No quiero decirte mentiras

I didn’t know what would happen
We all walked into it blind
I don’t ever lose the memories
Of amigos that I left behind

Don’t ask me anything
Anything about the war
Don’t ask about what happened
I don’t want to lie anymore

No me preguntes nada
Nada de la guerra
No me preguntes que paso
No quiero decirte mentiras
Track Name: I Slept With My Gun
I SLEPT WITH MY GUN
Curt Campbell / Mario Candela / Manny Orona / Radney Foster

t made me feel safe, it made me feel warm
Like my old teddy bear
I slept with my gun
I’d fire up a flare, to make sure we’re alone
Dug my hole a little deeper
And slept with my gun

Dreaming through that scope
I prayed they’d leave me alone
I couldn’t help wondering if I’d ever make it back home
One good night’s sleep is all I really ever wanted
I slept with my gun
I slept with my gun

When I got back
The whole world had changed
I ran my girl off... all I had left was my gun

Dreaming through that scope
It never leaves me alone
Still wondering if I’d ever make it back home
One good night’s sleep was all I ever really wanted
I slept with my gun
I slept with my gun

Now I don’t keep it under my pillow
Because the danger’s never gone
It’s somewhere disassembled
Cause I’ve stripped it to the bone
I don’t sleep with my gun
I don’t sleep with my gun

Dreaming through that scope
It never leaves me alone
Sometimes I still wonder if I made it home
One good night’s sleep is all I ever really wanted
I don’t sleep with my gun
Track Name: I'll Be Fine
I'LL BE FINE
Frank Acevedo / Jimmy Perez / Brad Parker

Walkin’ out the gate
Of my very last base
No parades, no banners
Just get out of this place

On military time
We worked as a team
Now I’m back on the street
Gotta find my own dream

I wanted to go home
But you can’t go back in time
So you go your way, I’ll go mine
Don’t worry ‘bout me cause I’ll be fine

Everybody says that
You have changed
Well, what did I expect?
Man, this sure seems strange

I see you over there
Out across the plain
But I can’t catch up
And I can’t explain

I wanted to go home
But you can’t go back in time
So you go your way, I’ll go mine
Don’t worry ‘bout me cause I’ll be fine

Now, I realize, I don’t need the past
Let’s work together on the things that last...
Track Name: Track Of Time
TRACK OF TIME
Jesse Hopkin / Jerryl Rita / Raul Villanueva / Darden Smith

When I was out to sea
Without my family
Sometimes I’d go a week
And never the sun
What day was it anyway
Tuesday or Wednesday
Clock on the wall don’t mean
Nothing at all to me
The rotors on the helo go round and round
The sound of the planes so goddamn loud
Don’t think, just do, it’s only later I find
I’m losing the track of time

Bloody boots kicking in doors
Another brother hits the floor
We gotta keep moving
No time to say goodbye to you
It was only when I got back home
It was midnight I was all alone
It all came back and I can’t deny
What’s true, I’m missing you
Put the pen on the paper and I fill up the page
Tears start coming cause I’m still in a rage
I don’t think I just do and I can’t deny the sign
I’ve lost the track of time

I thought when I came
Home it would be the same
But while I was gone
Everything changed
Babies get born, families get torn
And I wonder what I was fighting for
And I wonder if I’m gonna spend the rest of my life trying to find
The track of time
Track Name: The Ones I Love
THE ONES I LOVE
Jesse Hopkin / Jerryl Rita / John Sweredoski / Darden Smith

I feared of the night
I feared of the light
Still I always ran to the fight
I feared of the dark
I feared of the mark
That somehow I wasn’t enough I feared of the snap
Of the bullet gone past
But back home I fear the bullets
On the street every time
My kids walk out the door

But the greatest fear inside of me
Is losing the ones I love

I feared IEDs
Snipers in the trees
Knowing what it really means to be free
I feared coming back home
Feel so alone
Cause no one knows what it means to be me
Cause every firefight
Every man in my sights
Took a little part of me
And all I’ve got left now
Are my wife and my kids

Cause the greatest fear inside of me
Is losing the ones I love

When nothing makes sense I see the innocence
In their eyes
And I realize
I want to come home
I just want to come home

And the greatest fear inside of me
Is losing the ones I love
And I might just be one of the ones
I love I don’t want to lose the one I love
Track Name: I Need Rain
I NEED RAIN
Curtis Campbell / John Sweredoski / Brad Parker

I woke up dreamin’ this mornin’
Maybe these pills are making me crazy
If the weather is up or the weather is down
Hey, I’m a farmer and I can’t be lazy
I might be crazy, I might be insane
But I need rain

The waterman’s bill is due
But if the crops don’t grow I ain’t makin’ no green
I got broccoli, cauliflower, carrots and kale
And nothin’s gonna stop me from livin’ this dream
I might be crazy but I’m not insane
And I need rain

I need rain
I need rain
I need rain
I need rain
I might be crazy but I’m not insane
And I need rain
Track Name: Wrong Door
WRONG DOOR
Darden Smith & Group

You took what was mine
I’d had it a long time
It was my baby
I missed the sounds we made together
There’s an itch I cannot scratch
Cause I can’t get it back

I know you did it
I’m knocking on your door
I want to knock you to the floor
I’ve been here before
And I’m thinking what if I’m knocking on the wrong door

I see who you are
And you look just like me
It’s breaking my heart
I came from where you are
I’m looking at myself
And I can see what’s true

Just give me my rig
I’m willing to forgive
I know how hard it is to live I’ve been here before
I’m looking at myself
Standing outside your door