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SW​:​S Retreat August NY 2018

by SongwritingWith:Soldiers

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Colin Connors
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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

    All purchases are tax-deductible donations to SongwritingWith:Soldiers.

    Our retreats pair professional songwriters with veterans, military families and couples, and active-duty service members to write songs about their military experiences and returning home.

    The following veterans participated in the August NY 2018 retreat: Robin Caudell, Thomas Haynes, Mike Jarvis, Carey Monkelbaan, Eric Monkelbaan, Jim Reeves, Alicia Seda

    These are songs recorded on site at retreats. They capture a song just hours after being written, like the song taking its first breath.
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1.
Decoy Story 02:06
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DECOY STORY Thomas Haynes / Mike Jarvis / Carey Monkelbaan / Eric Monkelbaan Jim Reeves / Alicia Seda / Robin Caudell / Darden Smith Oh boy I got a decoy story Oh boy I got a decoy story People ask me questions The want to know what I did In the service in the war zone But I keep that story hid It was my job, what I did But it’s not like the TV show I’d tell you what it was really like But I don’t think you want to know Oh boy I got a decoy story Oh boy I got a decoy story I’d tell you the truth But it would take to long You might be scared Or think what I did was wrong So let’s talk about home Weather or the time away But I loved it man I just can’t find the right words to say Oh boy I got a decoy story Oh boy I got a decoy story Something's are not in the history book When it’s declassified then maybe you can a look Oh boy I got a decoy story Oh boy I got a decoy story © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Darden Smith Music (ASCAP)
2.
Sinking Sand 03:05
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SINKING SAND Robin Caudell / Georgia Middleman I’m too young to retire Too old to be hired So what do you do in a gig economy? It’s like a patchwork quilt Job to job to pay the bills where the worker has no autonomy just when think you’ve set your golden years a damn pink slip appears You think you’re standing on solid ground and then the earth tilts and sways and hey Like my grandma used say Where there is a will there is a way So I huddle in my soul A solid place to stand Cause all other ground is sinking sand They send you to school To learn all the rules But they never tell you how you can break ‘em You figure that all out While you’re living hand to mouth Between the time you go to sleep and awaken ‘cause that’s the place where you connect To your spirit and what’s coming next You think you’re standing on solid ground and then the earth tilts and sways and hey Like my grandma used say where there is a will there is a way So I huddle in my soul A solid place to stand Cause all other ground is sinking sand You think you’re standing on solid ground then the earth tilts and sways and hey Like my grandma used say where there is a will there is a way So huddle in your soul The only solid place to stand Cause all other ground is sinking sand © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Middle Girl Music (ASCAP)
3.
Call You On Sunday 03:38
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CALL YOU ON SUNDAY Thomas Haynes / Jay Clementi There’s a copper crimson sunset glowing on those mountains That are dark as the stains on my soul from the past 36 hours I’m gonna pull the shades down on that window cuz I’m about to call I don’t want to let on and have you worry bout it all I only call you on Sunday I don’t want you waiting on that phone to ring every single day I know you carry the weight of our world taking care of our home our son and our sweet little girl I’m six thousand miles away, I’m coming home to you one day I won’t have to say I’ll call you on Sunday My love for you is greater than, the sky the moon and earth You’re the last thing on my mind at night and morning you’re the first It’s all the little things, that you don’t have to say It’s the memory your almond eye, that gets me through the day I only call you on Sunday I don’t want you waiting on that phone to ring every single day I know you carry the weight of our world taking care of our home our son and our sweet little girl And I’m sorry it has to be this way, I’m coming home to you one day and I won’t have to Only call you on Sunday I don’t know how you’ve done it, for so many years The dedication and strength, to hold back tears The patience and the grace to let me do what I want to do Trust me I know I hit the lottery with you I only call you on Sunday I don’t want you waiting on that phone to ring every single day I know you carry the weight of our world taking care of our home our son and our sweet little girl Baby you’re the prayer I pray, I’m coming home to you one day I won’t have to I’ll call you on Sunday © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Sony ATV Cross Keys (ASCAP)
4.
I Prey On It 03:40
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I PREY ON IT Carrie Monkelbaan / Jay Clementi / Darden Smith I can read the situation Master of manipulation I sense your weakness and your fears Innocence in tears And I prey on it I know how to make you trust me All the words that make you love me My puppet on a string You’ll do anything And I prey on it Tell you the truth I hurt you and I liked it That’s what I do I know there’s nothing you can do about Make you feel dirty and worthless Make you think that you deserve it and I prey on it If I’m just being honest Long ago I killed my conscience It’s a certain kinda freedom I see what I what I need and I prey on Tell you the truth I hurt you and I liked it That’s what I do I know there’s nothing you can do about Make you feel dirty and worthless Make you think that you deserve it and I prey on it Nobody’s gonna listen to those stories that you tell Anyway I got a plan to talk my way out of hell Tell you the truth I hurt you and I liked it That’s what I do I know there’s nothing you can do about Make you feel dirty and worthless Make you think that you deserve it and I prey on it I prey on it I prey on it I’ll make you never trust Girl you’ll always feel my touch And I prey on it © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Darden Smith Music (ASCAP) / Sony ATV Cross Keys (ASCAP)
5.
You're My Mission 04:39
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YOU’RE MY MISSION Eric Monkelbaan / Terry Radigan I live the war I never saw Each and every day Not in words but in your eyes And the things you’ll never say I’m sorry I didn’t find you sooner And that I couldn’t keep you safe That you had to fight that battle all alone That you’re still fighting here today And all that I can do is to be there To hold you close and let you know I ain’t going nowhere You’re my mission And I need you to listen Give me all your yesterdays Let me take them all away Give me all your sorrows Let me walk you to tomorrow Girl cause loving you Its what I was born to do You’re my mission baby I need you to listen I can’t set you free from those memories But girl we’re making new ones In that little white house where we raise our daughter and our son And that cabin way back in the woods Where we’ll grow old together Cause Carey you are and will always be My one and only forever You’re my mission And I need you to listen Give me your yesterdays Let me take them all away Give me all your sorrows Let me walk you to tomorrow Girl cause loving you That’s what I was born to do You’re my mission And I need you to listen That each and every single day The sun will rise I’ll take away One more tear from your eyes That each and every single day The sun will rise I’ll take away One more tear from your eyes That each and every single day The sun will rise I’ll take away One more tear from your eyes © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Catherine the Great (ASCAP)
6.
Free Fall School 03:29
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FREE FALL SCHOOL Jim Reeves / Georgia Middleman I remember when I heard that crack and a ringing in my ear I reached up for my risers But only one of my hands appeared The other one was fast asleep And swinging in the wind If I was gonna land this jump I’d better do something quick Cause power lines and train tracks Won’t be the death of me Free fall school Where the only rule Is to learn to find your feet When you’re falling fast And isn’t that what life is anyway Just one big free fall school My creative side And who I was I had to put away ‘cause Uncle Sam Don’t give a damn Bout what you drew today But you gotta feed the monster Once you let him in So I took out my paint And found that part of me again I learned how to readjust When life’s out of control in Free fall school Where the only rule Is to learn to find your feet When you’re falling fast And isn’t that what life is anyway Just one big free fall school Eyes on the horizon Drop what you don’t need overcome the obstacles and do what sets you free Free fall school Where the only rule Is to learn to find your feet When you’re falling fast And isn’t that what life is anyway Free fall school Where the only rule Is to learn to find your feet When you’re falling fast And isn’t that what life is anyway Just one big free fall school One big free fall school © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Middle Girl Music (ASCAP)
7.
Walking Into The Light 04:08
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WALKING IN THE LIGHT Alicia Seda / Darden Smith I was a mess but didn’t know it A wreck but did not show it I drank to keep from feeling All the pain that needed healing down inside I got so good at running I never saw this coming All trouble that I tried to leave At 28 caught up with me this time And if everything is equal The good times and the bad When I look back on the life that I have had I have seen some darkness And I’m worn out from the fight It’s time that I start walking in the light Through the tears and anger The sadness and danger I hit bottom and it hurt I saw that life was surely worth much more Now I’m no longer running Changed who I’m becoming And a new life I am leading A new song I will be singing for my lord Cause if everything is equal The good times and the bad When I look back on this life that I have had Well I have seen some darkness And I’m worn out from the fight It’s time that I started walking in the light Guess it’s time I started walking in the light You see I forgave the darkness And I made peace with that fight So that I could start walking in the light So that I could start walking in the light Walking in the light © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Darden Smith Music (ASCAP)
8.
Eventually 03:11
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EVENTUALLY Mike Jarvis / Terry Radigan I musta been 4 or 5 years old Holding my father’s tools Not doing what I was told And learning how to break the rules When i saw you standing at your mother’s side The picture perfect poster child for polite I didn’t know back then There’d be a you & me Eventually Fast forward to the lion’s den I’d see you hanging round But I was busy with my friends On the wrong side of town Getting into trouble Learning all the wrong things You were honor roll book club All halo & wings Still didn’t know back then There’d be a you & me Eventually You were keeping tabs on my All those years One day you thanked me for my service And i said you wanna grab a beer I didn’t pay for your drinks But i did play wagon wheel And that was the start of something real And I knew right then I’d found my best friend So on Christmas Eve I said girl will you marry me Eventually Yeah cause I knew right then I’d found my best friend I didn’t get down on one knee But still I asked you to marry me Eventually © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Catherine the Great (ASCAP)
9.
Hammer On Steel 02:23
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HAMMER ON STEEL Thomas Haynes / Mike Jarvis / Carey Monkelbaan / Eric Monkelbaan Jim Reeves / Alicia Seda / Robin Caudell Darden Smith / Jay Clementi / Georgia Middleman / Terry Radigan / Kenny Neal My heart pounds like hammer on steel I have left the roads, the roads that I have known So I could walk out into, into the great unknown I don’t know where I’m going But I know I’m not alone I’m going home My bag is packed with love, with love and doubt and fear My demons they walk with me, they are always near Yeah, they’re my traveling buddies So I know I’m not alone I’m going home My heart pounds like hammer on steel But that ain’t gonna stop me One foot and then the other From the roads I left behind me It can’t get any tougher I can hear my own heart beating, got a ringing in my ears No time to turn around, the path is never clear But I got a faith inside of me And I know I’m not alone I’m going home My heart pounds like hammer on steel One, Two, Three But that ain’t gonna stop me One foot and then the other From the roads I left behind me It can’t get any tougher My heart pounds like hammer on steel Follow me If your heart pounds like hammer on steel © 2018 SongwritingWith:Soldiers Music (ASCAP) / Darden Smith Music (ASCAP) / Sony ATV Cross Keys (ASCAP) / Middle Girl Music (ASCAP) / Catherine the Great (ASCAP)

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released September 5, 2018

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SongwritingWith:Soldiers Nashville, Tennessee

SongwritingWith:Soldiers is a non-profit 501c (3) organization.

Our Mission: We transform lives by using collaborative songwriting to expand creativity, connections, and strengths.

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